Anyone there?

I'm am probably the world's worst blogger because I NEVER update. Well, second worst....megaaaaaaaaaan (that's supposed to be read in the style of "gillyyyyyyyyyyyyy"). Now that I'm back, at least for now, I think I should clarify some things about my semi-recent posts:

Anyone who reads this knows that I'm, sadly, still hopelessly in love with Meggie. As usual, I've seen the errors in my ways and have a billion regrets. I can't do anything about it currently. I've taken all the steps that are possible as of right now. The result? Probably the best that I could hope to receive. Now all I can do is wait.

School....ohhhhhhhhh, school. My appeal for internship was denied. I took the required Praxis and have to wait until January to Student Teach. It's easier to get a job in May anyway.

Housing. I, currently, need a place to live. I'm thinking about moving in with a friend of mine. I doubt it'll be a problem, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed.



Other news...I am loving The Blueprint III.

Shut Up

Yes, I love her.

No, I can't stop loving her.

Yes, I support that she loves someone else.

No, I've never met this 'someone else'

No, I'm not willing to try to let her love anyone other that me

I know that I'm less-than-desirable

Daddy's Back...for now

Here's the skinny (or in my case, not-so-skinny):

I'm working. If you wake up and ask yourself, "I wonder what Big Mike is doing?"..If you wanna go grab a bite to eat for lunch...If you just wanna call me and catch up....The answer is I'm working. Oh, and my cell phone has crapped out again. I know, I know. I break phones all the time. I'll get the problem fixed soon. Here's the deal about this job:

• I work from 6am to whenever the boss says to go home. Monday thru Saturday. (sometimes Sunday)
  
• I get (as of 2 days ago) $9.00/hour
• If I work more than 40 hours a week, I get time + 1/2. (Now $13.50)
• I routinely work 60-70 hours a week.
  
• Ugh.

I did, however, find time to watch the first episode of The Real World: Cancun. Here's another bulleted list containing my thoughts:

• CJ is a dreamboat. Even I would have sex with this man. Not surprising, I know. He's cool in my book though. He has a gf. I believe he will not cheat on her, even though he's already SLEPT in a female roommates bed. (He should have slept with Derek)
• Joey is an ass. That's it. He's a creep.
  
• Derek is the only normal person in the house. I have a slight man-crush on him. Of course, he's gay.
  
• Emilee is too much. Too nice. Too sweet. Too much. She wants CJ even though he has a woman. No, Emilee.
• Jasmine/Ayiiia are nothing to me....yet.
  
• Bronne is me. You know it. I know it. He got so drunk that he made out with a woman's MOTHER. He has little personality other than being a follower. I'm anxious to see this season so that Bronne can show me what I would be like on the RR.
• I have saved Jonna for last on purpose. This damn girl. She has a bf at home. Listen to me closely: No she doesn't. She "started dating" this homely looking guy (to quote High Fidelity: "What I really learned from the whole Charlie Debacle is that you gotta punch your weight. Charlie was out of my Class: too pretty, too smart, too witty, too much. What am I? Average. A middleweight. Not the smartest guy in the world, but certainly not the dumbest.") before she got on the show so that she could be the drama queen that cheated on her significant other. She told Derek that she wouldn't. She will. I just hope it's not with CJ. Needless to say, I don't like this girl. As the adage goes: If she looks like a liar and she sounds like a liar, she's a slut.
  

PS: This song is on Repeat in my head lately.

Summertime Update

I'm in Russellville. I'm poor. There's nothing to do. I'm looking for a job. That's what's been happening in my life.

I recently have become addicted to Disc Golf. If you don't know what that is, look it up on YouTube. It looks nerdy, but it's SO fun.

Other than that, I'm a loser. Nothing going on in my world. :(

Follow Up

I know that Fayetteville will be more fun. Russellville sucks. I know this. You know this. There is nothing to do, hence, nothing to spend my hard earned money on. With the money saved, I could purchase a much needed vehicle for my internship this fall. Basically, it's Fun vs Responsibility.

Clap Ya Hands Like This...

Like THIS!

The sun is out today. I don't know for how long, but Mikey likey. As for what's new with me, it's Finals Week at Arkansas Tech University. That means a couple of things. 1) I don't study. 2) My classes are at strange times during the day. 3) I get to stay up late for no reason. 4) The semester is almost over. 5) As a result of #4, I have to make a decision about my summer plans.

I have narrowed it down to two options. I can either:

1. Maintain my residence in Russellville. Get a job (probably the shitty factory job that I used to have working nights). Try to save money. Try to lose weight. Play a shit-load of sand volleyball with friends. Orrrrrrrrrrr...
   
2. Pretty much move to Fayetteville. Stay with Marshall and Lauren. Work behind the bar at Habibi like last summer. TRY to workout regularly, eat healthy, and lose weight. TRY NOT to spend all my money at restaurants and the mall. Play a shit-load of sand volleyball in the Fayetteville Summer Sand Volleyball League. Have tons of fun.
   

Came Up Short

After a looooooooong weekend in North Carolina, I regret to inform you that I am NOT a National Champion. As it turns out, there's only one winner, and we lost. Out of the 40 teams that were there, we finished 4th. An admirable finish, you say? Sure. Except for the fact that we had a legitimate chance of winning the whole she-bang-a-bang. There was only one team that was definitively better than us, and we didn't even get a chance to play them. Oh well, right?

We got to visit the Duke and UNC campuses. If you don't already know, I am a HUGE Duke Blue Devil fan, so the sight-seeing was the highlight of the trip for me. We shopped the Duke bookstore and bought several pieces of Duke apparel. Among the unreal parts of the trip: We got into Cameron Indoor Stadium (where Duke plays their games.) I walked on Coach K Court. I hung from the actual rims that they play on. I randomly ran into Duke Players Jon Scheyer, Greg Paulus, and Brian Zoubeck in the halls of Cameron. I got a picture with Greg Paulus. It was awesome. As for UNC's campus, their basketball arena was closed for renovations. I did, however, get to go through their basketball hall of fame museum. Yes, I was 6 inches away from Michael Jordan's UNC sneakers.

All in all, it was a good trip. Yeah, it sucks that we lost, but we gave it a good run. I had a sweet trip, good times, tons of laughs, and great memories. I'll post some pics when I get them developed.

PS: Dear Tall, Skinny Waitress from NC State Sports Bar,

No, I don't have a girlfriend. Yes, I am tall and relatively muscular. Yes, I feel awkward when you touch my shoulders too many times. Yes, I won trivia. Yes, I am smarter than you. No, I will not call you. No, I will not text you. Yes, you should eat something, Ms. Skinny. Peace out.

4 Day Weekend Post

Why do I have a four day weekend, you ask? Well, I get to wake up at 5 a.m and ride to Raleigh, NC tomorrow. I get to stay there until Sunday. Boo Yah. (or "Boosh," if you prefer) I get to hoop it up with the nation's best basketballers that AREN'T on a collegiate team. Let's hope that I can hold my own.

On to other news, why haven't I posted more often? I have no real reason. Laziness. Lack of fun stuff. All of the above. I can tell you what I HAVE been doing: drinking too much. Why is it that when any one of my friends wants to chill out and drink, I always answer a loud, resounding, enthusiastic, "I'm IN!?" Ugh. Whether it be vodka/tonics at the house with JG, 50 cent drafts at the 40 with Chris, Lauren, and Trent, or Burnett's Sweet Tea Vodka/Arby's Sweet Tea in the hot tub, I have been getting all kinds of drunk on all kinds of days of the week for no reason. There'll be no getting drunk this weekend because of the basketball. There'll be no drinking during the week next week either. Next weekend, however? I'll probably be back on the wagon.

Nothing could be more true

than the E-card shown above. *sigh*

Quick, Late Night Post

Here's the status quo:

• I'm tired from playing approximately 4 1/2 hours of basketball today.
• I smell like a foot. Or ass. Or a foot that's been lodged deep, deep in an ass.
• I want a shower.
  
• I want a post-shower Vodka and Tonic.
• I'm quickly realizing how much I need a lady.
• I'm quickly realizing how far I am getting from having a lady.
• Pandora is hooking me up with "Didn't We Almost Have It All" by Whitney

Bonus Pic

T-Town

Gorgeous...everyday.

Trav, Cavey, and me...Coronas are on special all summer long.

Theme Night: Golf Pros and Tennis Hoes.
That's how we do it.

A little beach volleyball.

Last Post Before FLORIDA!

I'm depressed. Well, depressed isn't the word. I'm kinda sad. No, that's not it either. In a blah mood? No, that doesn't cover it. Slightly perky. That doesn't envelop my emotions. Happy? Too generic. Excited? Not quite, but close. Bouncing off the walls and pumped out of my friggin' mind? Bingo.

In approximately 26 hours time, I will be on my way to the Sunshine State (Ah, Denver. GORGEOUS!). You can derive my emotions from my slightly sarcastic intro. School has been kicking my ass recently. I've been No-Carb dieting, which makes me even more crabby. Daddy is ready for a break. Rest and relaxation is gonna be great. Who am I kidding? We all know that I'm gonna stay out all night drinking, partying, possibly dancing, playing on the beach, eating any and everything that is in front of me, and all in all just living it up. I'll probably come home more tired than I am now. Probably 50 lbs heavier too.

Is It Worth It?

Saint Patty's Day is nearly upon us, and guess what? No green beer for me this year. Moreover, no beer of ANY color for me this year. Tragic. My reasoning? Spring Break is less than a week away, and I plan to spend 80-90% my time on or near a beach. Hence, no shirt (Yeeeeah, hence). If you know me (and if you're reading my blog, you do), you know my "Shirt-Off Policy" all too well. I avoid being seen topless at all cost. This 7-Day span in March is a small exception to the rule. Beer + Me = Chubs. Chubs + Topless = Gross. Gross + Self Image = Tears. If I continue my diet and workout schedule, I predict that I can drop another 5-7 lbs by this weekend. It'll be SOOOOOOOO worth it.

Before

After

Clarification

There has been some questions about my label choice on the last post. Here's where i got it and why I chose it: "Swagger Like Us." If you listen to it, a young man named Kanye West dropped the lyric, "How's it feel to wake up to be the shit AND the urine." I believe that he's trying to say that with his recent success, he has risen to levels higher than simply being "The Shit." To be witty and funny, he chose the line featured above. After beating ass in Mississippi, I felt like, all the sudden, we were/are the shit AND the urine.



And yes, we get to go to Raleigh, NC for nationals at NC State.

Famous Alumni include:

Senator John Edwards

Coach Bill Cowher

Comedian and Beard Enthusiast Zack Galifianakis

If You Haven't Heard...

We are the Champions.

Yeah, my intramural team won the Regional Tournament. I would like to say, "Sorry," to all the Mississippi State teams that thought they were gonna roll on that Arkansas Tech team of white guys, to the Ohio State team that lost in the first round of the tournament but "didn't see any competition here," the small Mississippi school that we beat 100-38 in the first round (we took out our starters after the first 4 minutes....we were up 23-0 at that point), and to the poor guy that wanted a rebound and didn't realize that Daddy could jump (seriously, dude, was your dignity really worth getting mashed on? It's not like the everyone in the gym saw it though........)

It wasn't this bad, but close.

I Wanna Take You Down

*Sing Songy Tone* I'm going to Mississippi. I'm going to Mississippi. I'm going to Mississippi. *End Sing Songy Tone*

If you've kept up with this blog, then you know that I get to go to Mississippi State University to play in the Intramural Regional Tournament. This means:

• I'll be at a SEC school and using SEC facilities


• I'll be treated like a star athlete for 3 days


• I get to miss classes on Friday


• I get tons of free merchandise from the sponsors

This is Dwight Howard. HOWARD. We're basically family, and I will be making our family proud by recreating this picture.

PS: "Take You Down" by Chris Brown makes me happy in a lot of ways.

Case of the Mondays

I'm already done with this week. I attribute these feelings to the fact that I didn't get much sleep last night. Ugh. When will I learn? If you stay up late and get up early, you're gonna feel like poop. Anyway. Here's a few things I can look forward to:

• This weekend is Regional Intramurals, so I get to go to Mississippi


• I "get" to teach a lesson on Golf on Friday


• Subway started their $5 Footlong Campaign again


• But I don't get to have any until my Cheat Day (Saturday)


• I get a PHONE THIS WEEK! Expect some calls...

Wickety Wickety...

...good mood! I have no reason to be in a good mood, but positivity is here. It's been a minute since my last post. A little bit has happened since then. In lieu of a list, I'll speak in paragraph form.
Jason's friend, Ryan Reichle, came to visit from the Great White North (read: Michigan). All times are approximate.
8 pm- Reichle got to our place
8:30- I got home from my night class
8:32- I took my first sip of a Whiskey and Cherry Coke Zero
8:55- I took my first sip of my second Whiskey and Cherry Coke Zero
9:15- I got into the shower
9:16- I quickly realized that I'd only eaten AN omelet that day
9:16-9:22- I tried to stay upright in the shower
10:30- We walked through the doors of the Illustrious North 40 Club
10:32- I took my first sip of my *insert cringe here* Diet Coke and 151
11ish- I took my first sip of my second DC and 151
12ish- I took my first sip....you get the idea
1ish- Jason told me that he and Reichle are leaving. "I know that you're gonna say no, but I think its a good idea for you to come with us."
1ish- I declined the invitation to leave
1:30ish- I asked Beau to run to the bar and get me another DC and 151
10 am- I woke up on the futon in our living room
10:01- I fell face first on my bed
2pm- I woke up.

Short story long, I don't know what happened during that "gap" in time. My jeans had mud all over them. My torso had/still has several scratches. Bruises are clearly evident. Scary.

Now that THAT's out of the way, the Arkansas Intramurals State Basketball Tournament was held in Conway this weekend. My team won the Tech Tournament, so we get to go to UCA and play the best teams from the colleges in the state. We beat all the teams in our pool. Oops. We got the #1 seed in the bracket. Double oops. We won the whole damn tournament. Triple oops. I was named to the All-Tournament Team. OopsOopsOopsOops. That's how Daddy does it. What does this mean? In two weeks, we get to travel to Mississippi State University and play the best teams in our region. Guess who is gonna act a damn fool in Starkville, Ms? Me. I'm the answer to that question.

PS: My phone is all kinds of f*cked up. A new one will be had SOON.

Valentine's Day Early

Ok. I know that it's a day early, but I had to make a Valentine's Day post. I, myself, do not have a "valentine" this year. Why? My own fault. I'm not THAT person that sulks because they do not have a significant other. Plans for tomorrow? I'll probably go out and have dinner, come home, maybe watch a movie, and drink some wine. Sounds fun.

I would like to say that I love each and every person that reads this blog. How do I know that? Well, I don't have too many readers, so it's not that hard to figure out. I'm thrilled that each of you are a part of my life. I'm a better person because of it.

***I'm adding this song simply because it's my favorite jam right now. I love it, and it loves me. Maybe this song can be my valentine.***

It's been a long time...

Why the lack of posts? Nothing much has been happening in Mikey's World (don'tcha know). I'll celebrate that fact with this list:

• I'm 2 1/2 weeks deep into my No-Carb Diet


• Sundays are wonderful because they're my cheat day


• I wish Jason would quit dragging his feet about Spring Break and just find a cruise


• Yes, my first cruise is in my immediate future


• Undefeated in intramural 5 on 5 basketball....obviously


• Hazelnut Cream candles make my bedroom smell fantasmic


• The weather is warming up, and you know what that means: Sand Volleyball Soon!

Manic Monday

Ahh, Monday. I'm feeling refreshed today. I know what you're saying/thinking: "Mike, why in the name of Zeus are you feeling refreshed on a damn Monday?" I'll tell you. Since I started my carb-diet last week, I had felt sluggish all week. Sundays, however, are my "cheat days," so I was able to eat and drink whatever I wanted yesterday. Best believe...that Daddy put in WORK. Here's a rundown:

• 2 Cinnamon Twists Donuts


• 1 Glazed Twist Donut


• 1 Pint of Chocolate Milk


• 1 Turkey Bacon Swiss Sub from Arby's


• 1 Chicken and Swiss Sandwich from Arby's


• 20ish Pizza Rolls


• 3 Coronas


• 3 Shots of Homemade Kahlua


• 5 Sam Adams Blackberry Witbier (I wholeheartedly recommend it)


• 2 Hamburgers off the grill


• 1 Pint of Phish Food Ben and Jerry's


• 1 Bowl of Lauren's Strawberry and Blueberry dessert dish (with Cool Whhhhip)


• 3 Beddar Cheddar Brats

• 25ish MORE Pizza Rolls


• 6 Nutty Bars


• 2 Glasses of Milk

Juuuuuuuuust great.

Quick note. My "Destiny's Child" station on Pandora is especially great this afternoon. It's like that woman with the box of evils can read my mood. Here's a run-down of the first 5 songs that were played...and enjoyed:

1. "Cater 2 U" by DC
   
2. "Do It To It" by Cherish and Sean Paul
   
3. "No Air" by Jordin Sparks and Chris Breeeeeezy
   
4. "Foolish" by Ashanti
   
5. "By Your Side" by Sade

PS: Shouts out to Marshall and the future Mrs. Ward. Congratulations, goofballs.

Surprise!

I woke up this morning. Got bundled up to ride to class. By CHANCE, I checked my e-mail (luckily, for my professor and myself). Why? Because both of my classes were canceled this morning (two classes...same professor). I don't know why I checked my e-mail. I just did. Now I get to lounge around the house until this afternoon when I have to go to an elementary school to do some field observation. It was still a good surprise.

Don't Judge Me

Here's the story (pardon me if it is wordy and long-winded):

Marshall, Jason, and I chose to go to Fayetteville on the evening of January 10. It was the last Saturday before we all had to report back to the unfriendly confines of Arkansas Tech. We had planned to go to Habibi first. Get some drinks. Then head to another bar or two. Then finish the night back at Habibi and do some after-hours drinking. Nice plan...

Trent and his girlfriend, Brittany, were going up to Fayetteville for a friend's birthday, so we decided to ride with them. We got to Habibi at 9 pm. By 10 pm, we were walking out the door to go to (insert Mike's cringe here) a strip club. If you know me, you know that I am COMPLETELY out of my element at a strip club. After we'd been there for a bit, Jason hits on a lady. NOT a dancer. NOT a waitress. NOT a bartender. Just simply a patron of the establishment. She tells him that she and her group of friends are planning on going out on Dickson Street later and that he should meet them. They exchange numbers. After an hour of diverting my eye contact from the stage, we leave. We're back at Habibi at 11:15. (<- That will be the last actual "time" that I remember) We tell Shane the stories of the club. We drink. We drink. We mingle. We drink.

Jason gets a text from ole girl. They're at Stir. He wants to go over there. I go as a wingman. We get there. Her friends are getting kicked out as we arrive. Literally. We don't have to pay the cover because the bouncers and doormen are escorting her friends to the street. Nice. She's about to leave since her friends got kicked out. I pound a drink. We leave. Next bar is called Z-330. It's packed. Shoulder to shoulder. Loud music. I go to the bar to get us a drink. Jason conversates with ole girl. After I make a lap to see if I know anyone else there, Jason finds me. Her and her friends are leaving. They're going home. No biggie. We go back to Habibi.

We arrive to Habibi to find it at around 1/2 capacity, which is busy for Habeebs. We drink. We mingle. We drink. Last call comes and goes. We go into the private room. We drink. We smoke hookah. We drink. Shane brings shots. We drink. We drink. Shane brings shots. We drink. We drink. Shane brings shots. We drink. We drink. Shane brings shots. We drink. You get the idea. People periodically leave. There is only Jason, Marshall, Shane, a girl named Christy, and a girl named Susan left. Marshall is talking about his pinched nerve and how hot tubs make it feel better. Susan comments that she has a hot tub. Uh-oh.

We make the drive to Springdale. I don't know how long it took. We get there. Sure enough, there's a hot tub out back. Splash. Marshall's in. Splash. Shane's in. Splash. Susan's in. Splash. Mike's in. Splash. Jason's in. Splash. Christy's in. I don't know the capacity of this particular model of spa, but I know that we were all in it. We drink. We soak. We drink. We soak. I play fetch with Susan's charming chocolate lab, Kota. Jason is the first one out. He's ready for bed. He goes inside, lies down, and falls asleep/passes out. Shane drops a beer bottle on the patio. Concrete + Glass = no good for bare feet or puppy dog feet. I hop out and sweep it up. I, then, decide that I don't want to get back in the tub. I want to dry off and call it a night. I don't know how long I sat on the couch watching tv, but then shane and marshall came in and announced our departure. We wake up Jason. I put Susan in bed. Christy goes to bed on her own. We leave.

On the car ride back to Shane's house, we decide that we're hungry. Our destination changes to Denny's. On the ride to Denny's, Marshall calls our buddy, Travis, that used to live with us but now lives in Tampa, Fl. Travis is awake. Why, you ask? Because according to Marshall's call log on his cell phone, we called him at 10:34 am, which made it 11:34 am EST. We laugh. We tell him about our evening/morning. Good times. When we arrive at Denny's we sit down, order too much food, talk loudly, curse loudly, receive angry stares from other tables, and laugh. Needless to say, the hostess didn't sit any other tables NEAR us. I guess I don't blame her since it WAS Sunday morning at 11. After paying the tab and leaving a hefty tip, we travel back to Shane's house. Upon arrival at approximately 11:45 am, Shane turns on Tropic Thunder. We laugh. We laugh. We laugh. We fall asleep.

Trent wakes us up. Apparently, it's time to leave. I don't realize it until we are already on the interstate and I look at the clock, but it is 12:30 pm. That's right, Ladies and Gents. We had been asleep for around 20-30 minutes. Never, throughout the whole night/morning, did any of us blackout. We remembered every moment.

We arrived in Fayetteville at 9pm on Saturday. We arrived back in Russellville at about 2:15 pm on Sunday. Our trip lasted a little more than 17 hours. It felt like a month.

*Some details of these accounts have been omitted by me*

Guess who's back...

Back again. Mikey's back. Tell a friend.

What have I done in my absence? I'll tell you. Nothing. Sad, I know. The most entertaining part of my life has kicked off withing the last 10 days. Last weekend, Megs and I made a trip to Conweezy to kick it with Melissa Margaret. It was a good time. We went out to Da, Da, Da Rock. Willy D's. Oh, how you slay me. I got called up on stage by the cutie that was rocking the piano. Why me, you ask? Because when the aforementioned cutie asked for a volunteer to come up on stage to do a toe touch, the Haney sisters and friends screamed and pointed at me. I went up there. Acted like a cheerleader. Did a toe touch. Was it a perfect toe touch? No. Was it the best possible toe touch that I am capable of doing? No, I was in jeans and dress shoes and hadn't stretched or warmed up. Was it a good enough toe touch to make the crowd go nuts? Yes. Apparently, I don't look athletic at all.

***Fast forward 30 minutes***

It happens to be a girl's birthday. Wait. TWO girls' birthday. They go up on stage. They need dance partners according to Piano Cutie. One has a boyfriend. He goes up on stage. The other doesn't have a boyfriend. Piano Cutie asks for a single guy to volunteer. Cue the Haney's and friends. I go. It's a dance contest. Country first. We goof off. We win. Next, how low can you go. I go lower. We win. Next, 90's white boy dance. I am white and was alive in the 90's. We win. Last...here's what hurts...chippendale's. AND we have to take off an article of clothing. Good grief. I, myself, have a button-down dress shirt on without a shirt underneath. I am not in the type of shape to take off my shirt in the middle of a bar. I choose the belt. I proceed to dance provocatively on a complete stranger. We win.

Here's the problem. The Haney's were completely shocked that I could dance like that. I have maintained, for years, that I CAN dance but CHOOSE not to. I get forced into a dancing situation, and due to my competitive streak and hatred of losing, I perform. Short story long....I win.