And now for my next number....

...I'd like to return to a classic.

I know that, due to my lack of updates, I'm probably the worst blogger in history. ERRONEOUS! On a serious tip, I HAVE been going through some personal crap lately, and I'm glad that everyone's been supportive.

First off, Dock night, mutha bitches. There's nothing like mixing binge drinking and watersports. It's always a good time, and this year was no exception. I got to reminisce with my girl Tatum, The Miz, Slader, and Miss Sassyness, Megan. It couldn't have come at a better time. I needed some distractions from my emotional funk. Believe me, I got it.

More later...must go to class.

You're drunk....you're sexy.

Thanks, Stewie and Brian.

Meanwhile, my relationship is all but over. Cheers and Awww's are heard from the crowd. I, myself, am mixed. I hate the sadness. I love the freedom. Let me address that a predominantly female audience reads this horrible excuse of a blog. I hope you ladies don't hate me for being an ass. Maybe some of you do. Actually, one of you probably screams whole-heartedly that I'm an ass. You know who you are....or should be. Enough about my short comings...Dock Night soon. Ho-Ho Meeting soon. Plenty of good times and, you guessed it, Great Oldies...soon. Thank you for sticking by me. I love you....all.

Get....that....weight off my shoulders!

Here's the a fantabulous list of good things that are going on in Mikey's world:

• All I have left in Summer II is a cake-walk of a final tomorrow morning


• I'm going to end up with 6 credit hours worth of A's (in Senior-Level classes, no less)


• People are FINALLY coming back into town since school is gonna start soon, so I get to have someone to play with
  
• My horrible sun-burn is turning into a relatively sweet sun-tan (I'm never really tan, just a darker shade of red)
  
• I get to slap some volleyballs around tonight


• I overheard someone at work utter the sentence, "My mom goes to college," and they were serious.

In birthday news:

I know you all are wondering what I got....and I'm gonna tell you. New flip-flops, a Hastings Gift Card (with an, as yet, undetermined amount of $$$ on it), and the "Planet Earth" DVD Box Set. All wonderful gifts. Not to mention, I bought myself a gift in the form of "300" on DVD. I guess I just can't get enough of half naked men with oiled-up torsos.

To whom it may concern...

Ms. Megan Elizabeth Haney needs to construct a blog. You know she does. I know she does. The American People know she does. Face facts, pretty lady. It's pretty much inevitable.

Summer Ale, Fun Dip, and Laughs.

As the summer's starting to wind down, all kinds of things are popping off in Daddy's world. First thing's first, my classes are almost over. Hooray! I still have hella work to do before they're actually done. Boooooooo. Tonight, I get to go over to my girl Alexis' house and celebrate her arrival back in Ar with a few (read: too many) beverages. She's been in Vegas (yes, LAS VEGAS) all summer. Editor's Note: How is it that my parents want me to come home to mow the yard during the summer, but her parents move to Vegas and want her to come stay with them all summer?

Anyhooch, she hasn't drank in 3 months, so we're gonna get wamboozled this evening. I know what you all are thinking: "What does the lady of the house think of this night of alcoholic debauchery?" First off, Alexis and I are just friends and nothing's gonna change that. It's not like we're gonna be alone. There's several guys coming over for this eventful occasion. Anyway, the GF says that she's not going to go because she doesn't want to feel uncomfortable, plus, she doesn't like when I drink. Good.....times. I hope she knows that Daddy is gonna get fuckwaggled (thanks, Dusty) on Dock Night too.

Stay tuned for the following breaking news...

CANNONBALL! What? No.....I get to work on Campus this fall! In the Health and Physical Education Building no less! I know it doesn't really matter too much to you readers, but it means TONS to me. First, it means I get to tell the wonderful upper management at Brick Oven to shove it in several different orifices. Second, it means that I won't really have to leave campus for work. Third (and probably most importantly), I can work in shorts and a sleeveless shirt. I'm just a bit fired up about it. Ok, a LOT fired up.

Secondly, my girl, Alexis, is getting back into town today from a summer in Las Vegas. It's gonna be good times and great oldies when she gets here. Her long awaited arrival will be celebrated by 500 hugs from meeeeeeeeee.


Lastly, I would like to note that I frequent the post secret blog, and since Earth Mama referenced the orgasm postcard (which I agree with), I'm gonna reference one that hit really, really close to home for me. This little guy:

I feel like I could easily have sent this one to the nice folks at post secret. The message is simple, but the picture, the font, the colors, the roses...all of it is dead on. I'm gonna go sulk now.

"Have you ever fallen out of love?//Your feelings just disappeared//But it's yourself you're thinkin of//And so still you kept them near//Have you ever been untrue?//Even though you knew right from wrong//But the coward in you//Just kept them hanging on?"

Duh-nuh-na-na-Duh-na-naaaaaaah!

Word on the proverbial street was that Dock Night was scheduled for August 25. When I heard this, a big red flag popped up in my mind. Mostly because my significant other wanted me to go with her to visit her brother, his wife, and their son. I hate you, conflict. Well, today I found out that we are moving our visit to the 16th instead. Yaaaaaay! Mike Howard will officially be attending Dock Night! Seriously kids, I can't wait.

PS: Hoho, I'm still not-so-patiently waiting on the PERFECT link photo.

You've got the moves....I'll give you that.

As I said in my last post, my boy Anthony Lee was in town this weekend. He hung out with us in Russellville from Thursday until yesterday. We reflected on old stories, had a drink or two, played some hoops, and enjoyed Russellville as much as we could. Well, he decided that everyone needed to make a trip to Little Rock on Saturday night to celebrate the RIGHT way, so that's exactly what we did. First, the plan was that we were gonna have dinner at Benihana's. Deal. After a LOT of drinks at the restaurant, Anthony seems to think that the piano bars REQUIRE our presence. I get the hint from someone...that I need to refrain from drinking so that we have a driver. No biggie. We head to Willie D's. Apparently, they've added a downstairs "lounge" to give patrons a change of pace from the sometimes hectic piano playing. With a DJ spinning everything from T.I. to Ma$e to Prince, we spent most of our time downstairs. Also, I'd like to apologize to the owners of Willy D's. If you guys will print us up a bill, we'll be glad to cover the damage. We really didn't intend to obliterate your dance floor. You really should think about treating it with some sort of fire retardant. It's not our fault that it caught fire and continued blazing all night long. Maybe next time we should give you some notice and call before we come. Sorry...again.